You make me wanna surrender my soul.

It's always during these ungodly times when things strike me most vulnerably. Tonight, many thoughts ran through my head. Very random things. Things I thought I've forgotten. Memories I never wanted to be resurrected. Thoughts I thought I have long left behind me in my pursuit of moving forward.

It felt so long ago, when we last spoke.
Yet it felt like we've just met a day before yesterday.
Little did I know, that almost two years has passed us by.

I used to be so in love, in love with you.
Funny how I managed to pull through, after a year.
I'm grateful I was in love with you once upon a time.
To have learnt what it was to hurt, what it was to give.
To grow up.

I'm glad that you have finally found the one
Who you love and who'd love you just the same.

いつまでも心の中にいると言いましたね、その時。
思いでに一番底の所かも知れない。
色々教えてありがとう。

*

Then there was you, my almost lover.
All the could have been's and what if's,
The saddest words of tongue and pen,
I could never finish counting them.

Honestly, I have no idea why I let you walk in and out so easily,
And how you tend to always have a way to get to me.

Questions unasked,
And many answers left unspoken.
This bad romance,
I think we'll both compromise
If it were to remain a forgotten secret, between you and I.

I guess, there are just things that time can't seem to change.
I'm sure you'd agree to that.

*

Love,
You caught me at my darkest time, tangled in my own mess.
You were patient, and you were kind.
And I think that was how,
I deliriously lost myself in you.

I'm not a saint, nor the girl you wished for.
In fact, I'm very much imperfect.
But I'm pretty sure
You can never quite find another like me.

If you'd tell me that two is better than one,
Then would you meet me halfway,
As I pick up pace running this race?

We'll have quite a lot of tomorrows to paint.

*

Poison,
I'd like to think of you that way.
Cuz that's just how you are - addictive but dangerous.
But I know that you know,
That we can't possibly have enough of one another.

Those late night wishes to the stars,
Where I'd wish for nothing but to be
Walking the streets of New York city with you
Under the sun, or maybe the summer rain.
At that very moment.

This dysfunctional compromise,
Does it make us sinners to be caught in such ecstasy,
As we indulge ourselves in this thing we know we shouldn't?
My secret lover.

Those days when fun is an understatement,
I can't wait.

After typing everything and reading back the things I wrote, I realised that it's pretty funny that 3/4 of this post seem to be associated with J's. Hmmmm... Why so sudden?

I have completely no idea why :)