Saturday, February 28, 2009

Only Human.

I remember there was a song by the name of this - Only Human. And it was a good song. After talking to Qi, I decided to let the title of this post be Only Human and as for the reason, I'll keep it to myself.

He's only human, she said.

It's getting obvious.
It's not me being paranoid, I'm sure I'm not.

But why?

Must it be this way?

A friend mentioned this to me,

*Perhaps, it's just too much of a compensation.*

What about me?

I'm not putting colours for this post. 'm just gonna use pink, purple and red. Up to you guys to guess :)

我的感受, 你知道吗?

才发现, 连微笑都觉得很讽刺。


Cuz it's too fragile.

I'll try my best, in everything. I really will - to move on without any.

There We Go Again, Back To Square One.

We've been shuffled.

You and I, She and I

You, Me, Her and our Indian - Us.

All shuffled into different tutorials.

This sucks.

Let's just give it a try and see how things go but I'm sure,

I'm sure that we'll never find another bunch of crazy people like this.

I'll miss you people, you bunch of smelly people.

Friday, February 27, 2009


was the number of Saturday classes I had to attend in preparation of my JLPT Level 1 exams.

I don't know why but I have a feeling that this is gonna be a lenthy post. So, be prepared.

Finally got the results today. I passed! Finally. Now I've got my JLPT (Japanese Language Proficiency Test) Level 4, 3, 2 and 1. I'm so happy :)

Come to think of it, this class made a remarkable impact on this certain stage of my life, so far. This class of course, was the main reason why I managed to pass this crazy exam. I'm so thankful. There lies another reason however, to the significance of this course.

This class, was also how I met you. Our paths would never have intercepted if it wasn't for these Saturday classes.

When I first met you, I remember it was on the day when we had to sit for the entrance exam to qualify for the course. I had a different impression of you. I've even heard of you before I entered the class for the entrance exam. I have been told that there was a noisy boy inside the class, with girls chatting him up. He's not local, he's from New Zealand, they told me. I wasn't really bothered at that time, really. At that time, I never knew things would turn out this way today.

The next time I saw you, was on the first day of class. That was when I learnt of your name. Nice name, I thought. I've always favoured that name. We met outside class at the library, and that was the first time, we smiled and merely acknowledged each other.

Weeks passed, there were times when I'd wonder what happened when you were absent from class. I remember, you just sat right opposite me. We could see each other so clearly, so subtle. Yet we never talked. Just the mere hi and byes.

Oh, and I remember how you'd take the lift with me - cuz I was terrified of taking the lift alone. Since then, you were always there. And I still remember how you tricked me one afternoon, just to make me smile.

Too many things happened. Small things they were, yet so big. Numbing all my senses, making me vulnerable to you. That was when you made me fall, so deeply for you.

All in 10 classes, 20 hours. We started when the course ended, how beautiful.

And here we are today, marking the 27th - two months since I was petrified by your sudden departure.

- We had something so beautiful, yet it was gone in a blink of an eye. It past us by as if it had never happened, like a fading dream.

Thursday, February 26, 2009

So Long My Luckless Romance, Goodbye My Hopeless Dream.

I don't want to be shuffled.

I have a very very bad feeling about this.

Really, don't. want. to.

Actually, I feel pretty bad. Cuz it was all our fault, or we were all really taking them for granted. Can we not shuffle? I'll promise to be good. Sigh.

我知道会很辛苦, 也知道会很难受,
算了吧, 就只能接受.
然而, 用自己的方式去喜欢你.


It had been raining the entire day. Reminded me of you so effortlessly.

才知道有些感受, 我和他谁都不曾说出口
我们都是最好的朋友, 谁会有勇气去开口
故事的最后, 我们都不曾失去过什么.


Wednesday, February 25, 2009

Our Connection, You And Me, All Of Us.

I don't wanna change tutorials.

I don't want us all to be reshuffled.


能做对爱侣堕落成朋友, 谁心息.

My Rule Of Law

Assignments. They're going crazy. So much research have to be done, and so little time :(

Can someone tell me why is Consti so hard? :x

I can't help but wonder. I can't help but think, think about random stuff and fall deeper. Okay, not literally random - but, yea let's just dismiss it as random thoughts. I tend to get lost in my own vivid thoughts, of what may and may not be.

He's the reason for the teardrops on my guitar
The only thing that keeps me wishing on a wishing star
The only one who's got enough of me to break my heart
And he's all that I need to fall into.

- Teardrops On My Guitar by Taylor Swift

That's when you finally learn that 1 plus 1 might not always equal to two, and three was never a number which could balance.

I'd want to have a long drive to the beach,
And feel the wind blow through my hair,
Hearing the gushing sounds of the wave.

I'd want to sit in your car at night, driving aimlessly.
It doesn't matter where we're going,
I just want to be next to you, just the two of us.

I remember I've told you this before when you drove me home,
That I like to be driven around at night,
I can't explain why I love the feeling.

I wonder if you have forgotten.

; I'd fake a smile so he won't see.
...No, not just him - but you.

He, You And Me.

Had never found a song which could describe best, till I was told of this song.
There's nothing else I could say anymore. The lyrics have said all I wanted to.

Need I say more?

He and I had something beautiful
But so dysfunctional, it couldn't last
I loved him so but I let him go
Cuz I knew he'd never love me back.

Such pain as this shouldn't have to be experienced
I'm still reeling from the loss,
Still a little bit delirious.

Near to you, I am healing but it's taking so long
Cuz though he's gone and you are wonderful
It's hard to move on
Yet, I'm better near to you.

You and I have something different and I'm enjoying it cautiously
I'm battle scarred, I am working oh so hard
To get back to who I used to be.

He's disappearing, fading sudelly
I'm so close to being yours
Won't you stay with me please?

Yet, I'm better near to you.

- Near To You by A Fine Frenzy.

Tuesday, February 24, 2009

Euphoric Depression.

Finally, the pictures.

The rest are in Facebook, but it's being a real bitch to me. So slowwww.




Yes, I smiled showing my teeth :)

Well,we had time to make out. Wtf.

Until we realised bout Xinny the papparazzi.

Wtf I can't spell that word.


Chingy look so disturbed here lol.

Nah, an un-emo post :x

Now I feel emo, cuz my notes ain't neat. And I'm supposed to be putting them right, yet here I am, blogging. Okay, that was a joke. But I'm really bothered bout my notes, I don't like em messy. Imma go sort them out now.

Smileee, you bunch of emo people.

- I suddenly remembered today, that you promised me... A promise I thought we had forgotten. You promised that we'd meet again that night. Had you forgotten?

Monday, February 23, 2009

A Sad Symphony

People always ask, why is the blog so emo? And why am I so emo?

Well, the answer is pretty clear. I blog when I feel emo. That's the only place where I can spill everything out from my heart. Or perhaps, this is what I have became - Broken, inside and out.

I like melancholic stuff. I like reading melancholic quotes. I can even read them over and over again. Yes, I'm an emo bitch.

Came across this from Facebook, and I really like it. And Imma share it here with you guys.



I'm sorry I really can't translate this :(
Well, maybe personally I could.

Chasing after something inexistant, I sometimes wonder what I have been searching for. Perhaps it's you, perhaps it's me or perhaps, it's just myself whom I've lost. Wanting a place to turn to, when the strong wind blows my courage away. I turned back, just to realise I had nobody but myself. That's when I realised, the yesterday we had was far behind. The jovial feeling, so nostalgic.

Fading away in a constant state of confusion, I just can't find where I belong - like a withering rose.

How long has it been since it felt euphoric, up above the clouds?

...And I'd smile for you.

Sunday, February 22, 2009

For You, My Love.

When the song I Don’t Wanna Miss A Thing ended, Xin just had to add these few words,

“This is for you, Mr. ***** **. From Kamen.”

Hit me straight onto my face when she said that. And thus, the title of this post :)

Yes, this is for you my love.

Met up with Chingy and Xin at Gardens yesterday. Finally, our time has come – when we managed to sing our hearts out for 4 hours.

The night before:

Xin: eh, tomorrow want sing ah?
Me: of course sing! die die also sing. Mv runtuh also sing.


We sang happy songs! Yes, I do listen to happy songs – not just emo ones.

Well, the emo ones got me feeling emo for a moment though. Very gay stuff happened throughout the entire singing session. Chingy just had to make me sing Top Of The World with her, crazy woman. Thanks to that, I didn’t get to sing my Anyone Of Us *shifty eyes*

And we ate a lot! :O

That's how much 3 girls ate yo!

Chingy, when you wanna put bass speakers outside? Xin and I have practiced well enough to be your background singers :D

Oh yea, and Chingy was so high she had an early orgasm haha wtf. *inside joke* For those of you who are worried, no – we didn’t rape her or anything related to that.

It was a very enjoyable day indeed. I'm sorry for the great lack of picture. Was supposed to wait for Xin to send it to me first, but she's been missing lately.

Realising that what I assumed had been reality, wasn’t really reality after all. Searching for myself deliberately, I wonder how long it had been since I was caught in this state of confusion.

I'd just want your heart boy, even if it's just for a moment. You've been missing for far too long. It's too much for the empty heart to bear.

- Over and over again, I'd wonder if you've ever thought of me.


Saturday, February 21, 2009

I Remember...

That we'd stay up late,
Chatting to each other,
Seeing each other do stupid things in front of the camera,
And only sleep during the wee hours of the morning,

Because you loved me.

That you'd wake up and talk to me,
When you were halfway asleep,
Just to cheer me up,

Because you loved me.

That you'd call
Right before your meeting at work,
Just to wish me Good Morning,

Because you loved me.

Reminiscence, nostalgia. It wasn't long ago, yet it felt so far away. Perhaps, I've accepted the fact that you're no longer by my side. It isn't such a bad thing after all, the fact that we've ended this way.

Forgotten yesterdays, as it was too distant to remember,
Faded like smoke from the cigarette you always had,
Our smiles dissolved as though it had never existed.
Or maybe the day has come,
When I no longer remember your kisses
And you have forgotten my touch.

I just can't seem to find my way back.

Lost in a tangled mess.

I'd attempt to walk alone under the pouring rain,
Hoping that you wouldn''t see that
I'm crying.

Friday, February 20, 2009

When It All Felt Like A Crazy Dream, That's When It's Time To Wake Up.


这种恋爱太罕有, 不需真正拥有
成全, 衷心祝福然后, 就放手

放手, 还有这个好友

Dear Chingy, I know you can't read this. It's your fong sau song. I wouldn't have done the translations here if it wasn't for you lol.

We sing this tomorrow k?
- for your heartbroken friend.

Ironic how the lyrics are :)

There's some things in life which you need not own,
Along with the heartfelt blessings and
walk away, wishing the best for them.

It's enough to stay how we are this way.

As long as you're happy.

It doesn't matter what you said or did. We all know, we really do. I'd choose to believe that it was all a misunderstanding, cuz I'd always believe in you. No explanation would be needed by anyone anymore. Disappointment, it happens... we all were - but sometimes, silence is all we can give. Cuz we'd never want to dismantle the bond established among all of us.

You'll always be so fine.

I rest my case.

Thursday, February 19, 2009

Smile, Even If It Hurts.

My mind fled from you for a moment, I know.
I thought it could at least leave you behind.
My heart took a trip, just to realise
How much it needed you.

You're fabulous, I've always known.
All the great things you do, making sure I smiled.
I knew, you broke the heart - so badly indeed.

I've fell, I've hurt, I've cried.

Heartbroken, I knew it so well.


I'm also thankful, that I've came across someone like you :)
It wouldn't have been so fine without you, my summer boy.

I'll always remember, the places we've been to.
Where you've held my hand, where we've taken countless pictures,
Where you've kept me safe behind you, where you've kissed my face,
Not wanting to let me go.

I've drifted away to another, losing my way.
And got hurt halfway through.
By another who broke the already broken pieces.

I should've known it's time to let go,
I'm alright - yes I am.

Cuz I will be strong.


당신은 나는 바보 입니다

(Tangshinun Nanun Pabo Ibnida)

You...I Are Fools.

Have been listening to some old songs, and I suddenly remembered this song.
Brought back old memories from Taylors.
Ching, psst! Remember "tangshinun"? Haha that was so gay.

Just felt like using the song name as my post title.
You...I Are Fools.
Perhaps we all are in this game :)

Back to how we started, where there was nothing we had to lose.

* * * * *

A week more, and it'll be another month. Another month since you took your love away. I'm glad that we've been doing fine, without each other. Sad it might've been, but I still managed through my days after you've been gone. It's been quite some time since those grey italic words had been appearing at the end of my posts. Perhaps, it's all over and when that day comes, I'll come clean and I'll be able to show you the smile I've lost... if I ever find it back again.

I'll be fine without you, really.

Cuz I'm not a kid

But, I'll always be your princess.

- I really wanted to call you, telling you everything about what has happened. Afraid that you might misunderstand, I refrained my fingers from dialling your number. Fabulous you were, but this time... I managed to do it, let go.

Wednesday, February 18, 2009

Hearts Will Hurt, Cuz We Made A Stupid Mistake.

It was all a mistake, I'm sorry.

And I thought it was numb to pain.





要られたのはただ... you.



アンタは素晴らしいよ。You were fabulous like how I always told you.
You took my heart away and broke it into pieces,
You've taught me how it was to be heartbroken.
You've made me a big girl with your love, naive no more.
Thank you for everything as I'll always cherish them.
Now that I'm alright,

大好きのジョニー ... my summer boy.



It was all a matter of timing.
If only...we could have been.

ちょっとだけだけど、距離が遠いだなぁ ... my almost lover.

Qi showed me this song, the lyrics were great :)

Well, I never want to see you unhappy
I thought you'd want the same for me
Goodbye, my almost lover
Goodbye, my hopeless dream
I'm trying not to think about you, can't you just let me be?
So long, my luckless romance
Should've known you'd bring me heartache
Almost lovers always do.

Almost Lover by A Fine Frenzy.

Psst! Jia Xin, you can have some practice on your Jap! I'm sorry babes. PM me, I promise I'll translate it for y'all :(

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

That's Where She Lies, Broken Inside.

It's confirmed.
It's a god-damned jinx.

I can never work out with Js - end of story.

Why does everyone keep doing this?
Making me fall in love and when I finally do, you'd leave me alone

Guess I just don't deserve anyone after all.

I thought I wouldn't fall into the stupid trap anymore,
I can't afford to play this game.
Yet I still fell blindly.

Why must it be the same thing you said to me?
You promised me, didn't you?
That you wouldn't tell me that,

I really like you, but I really don't want to hurt you.
I'm sorry.

Those words had hurt me deeply once,
Breaking my heart into pieces,
Now, it pierced through my heart once again.

Little did I know that,
You would say the exact same thing to me,
Letting me go through everything all over again,
This time, along with you in the pain.

I told you to leave if you have to,
Just don't tell me those words which would hurt me so badly.

Yet, you had to.

I'm By Your Side, Didn't I Tell You?

I can't help myself.

I don't know how this happened.

You made me lost in you, unable to find my way out.
Falling into the trap which I've just risen from.

It's fine how things are, I wouldn't wanna change it.

Slowly picking up the broken pieces of myself,
Still figuring a way to put them back together.
I can never do this alone for it'll only remain shattered.
I need you to hold my hand and bring me away.
Yet I know, I gotta do this alone.
Finding my way in darkness.

I really wanna tell you that I need you.
I really wanna show you things that I see.
I really wanna squeeze your hand so tightly.

Please don't say sorry, this is not your fault.

Take one step at a time and we'll be fine.
Cuz I'll always be here when you turn around.

Monday, February 16, 2009

If Only... We Were To Be.

I'm crazily tired today.

Went to Uni for the Lexis Nexis thing and off for movie. Watched The Curious Case of Benjamin Button.

The movie was a bit lengthy but overall it was fine :)

I'm so tired that I'm too lazy to blog. Feels as if my brain is completely separated from my head, it's not functioning. Shut up, don't even think of saying it never functions. It does, just not now. I barely slept.

I don't wanna think,
Of what's gonna happen next.
Boy, can I just close my eyes,
And let you guide me
...will you?

My eyelids.. they're falling.


Sunday, February 15, 2009

This Moment Is Perfect, Please Don't Go Away.

I feel so dead. Slept at 4.30 am and woke up at 9.30 am. 5 freaking hours. I'm dead.

Went to Phuture & Velvet at Zouk last night. Phuture was crazily packed. There were complications at the beginning of the night but nevertheles, it was alright. Slightly emo night for Qi and I, the same reasons :)

Qi & I while waiting for the rest to come.

With Kian Guan.

Eh, open your eye bigger can a not. And thus,


And then to LiHong's farewell at TGIF, Curve. It's been 7 years darlingg. Our relationship had been so strong, and now you have to leave for Melbourne so soon :(

The lovebirds :)

We're gonna miss you babe. <3

Li Pek Hong, you better take good care of yourself in Melbourne and stay loyal to us bitches. Don't let us catch you cheating on us, if not we'll go find you and cut your balls off in Melb. Loveeeee.

Why is it so hard that things have to come at the wrong time? I really don't know. All the ifs, all the could have beens. What would they essentially mean if it was just, us and nobody else. Yet again, it's only an if... cuz we both know it can only stop here, right now at least - cuz we can never know what lies ahead of us.

- It's about time to keep you deep inside my heart, where you can no longer hurt me. At least when I don't think about it, you won't manage to hurt me... or perhaps, the scar was already too deep that a little bit more wouldn't hurt.

Saturday, February 14, 2009

Be My Valentine

...would you?

Tonight, we're both alone.

Watched lovers walking happily together with smiles on their faces.
They're so deeply in love.
As I watched them, I cant help but think,
If I were to have you by my side, hand in hand,

I would want nothing more.

Perhaps, it's time that I should stop.
Hurting myself as I stay dwelling in the past.
Upon the broken pieces left of me.

This night, I miss you... how I always did.
I know that you know I do.

Tonight, I shall attempt the art of deceit. Where the mind is at a state where you have never appeared, and knew nobody with your name, Mr J. And where the heart was still whole, ignorant to the pain it had been forced to endure.

Happy Valentines....and me you :)

Hoping upon hope that it was all a dream, I really need to free myself and run away from this mess.

I need to flee, into my own sanctuary
where I can hide and my tears can finally be free.
I'll shout like the world can't hear.
I'll cry like I've never did.
And then pick myself up, portraying a smile for the world to see,
letting them know I'm alright.

And finally, let my emotions sink deep under, into the darkest part of me

where only I can find.

- To you, enjoy tonight. And let's hope we can both cope well with solitude.

Happy Valentines Day

May all the lovers be blessed, blissfully in love forever.

As for the singles, have a happy Valentines with your friends. I'm sure it'll be enjoyable too :)

May it be filled with heartfelt wishes, deep hugs and breath-taking kisses.

Was out with Flo, eating dinner with her. Seriously, we were like Desperate Housewives. Complaining bout the shit that happens.

She was saying how bad it was when she was shopping alone in Gardens and everyone else were shopping for gifts for their loved ones. A random guy even asked her to help hold the bag to see if it'd suit his gf wtf. And then, there was also the Waja car behind us till we reached the toll ;)

But it was fun nevertheless.

You never failed to make me laugh babe.

- I'll try my very best, to enjoy myself like I would if you have never appeared into my life - at least for tomorrow.

Friday, February 13, 2009

Don't Wonder Why, Cuz You'll Be Sad.

Qi said,

Why are all the good guys taken,
And the good girls get their hearts broken?

And the lucky bitches never know how lucky they are.

That's how ironic life is.

I've mentioned this before, it's really tragical when you meet the right person at the wrong timing. And once again, I stand by this.

Cheer up babe. We know we'll be alright :)

Even if you're messed up now,
Even if your heart's bleeding now,
Even if the scar on your heart will never heal,
Time will numb your pain inside
And before you know it,

The one who knows how to treat you right will eventually find you
right where you are.

He's not everything. You deserve better. You always have us supporting you.

- Yet it's so hard for me when it comes to you.

Thursday, February 12, 2009





Where would you be at this time of tomorrow?

I wonder who would you be thinking of

You will always be inside my heart

There'll always be a place just for you

I hope that I have a place in your heart too.

- First Love by Utada Hikaru.

I never said I wanted a prince, I never wished for my fairy tale to happen.

You were more than anything I could've asked for.

- The weekend could have been so sweet, if it wasn't for what had happened. I would once again, have everything a girl would've ever wished for.

Sadly, I'm no more your princess.

Wednesday, February 11, 2009

The Empty Space Between Your Fingers Were For Me To Fill

Sadly, you'd rather it be empty - unwilling to let me fill it up for you.

If only I could, I could've given anything :)

Holding on, the days drag on,
Stupid girl, I should have known.
I'm not a princess, this ain't a fairy tale,
I'm not the one you'll sweep off her feet, lead her up the stairwell,
I was a dreamer before you went and let me down,
Baby I was naive, got lost in your eyes,
I had so many dreams about you and me,
Happy endings, now I know;

I'm not a princess.

- White Horse byTaylor Swift.

* * * * *

The day started off funny when Qi tried to inhale helium gas from the balloons and attempted on singing Fall for You, which literally failed.

Thanks Qi, and not forgetting you, B :)

Heart shaped balloon with helium gas

Note attached to it.

Haha you chose just the right note B.

Orientation Night went on alright today. Started up a bit messy but it eventully turned out alright. Cupcakes were goooood. Yummeh. But I didn't get to snap a pic of em that time, my phone wasn't with me.

I was sold for 200 bucks in the auction. Hugs and kisses to those who bid. You know who you were. I love you people. <3

Qi & Eu Jin

They look cute together :)

Head Boy and I

I know you people tried to make my day, afraid that I would get emo. I really appreciate it guys. Lovesss.

Went off for a short yam cha session with Qi, B and Eu Jin at Devi's in Bangsar, and then home.

I couldn't find the white socks in time, and instead I went with black. Cuz apparently, black was also alright so yea... :) We seriously looked like school dropouts at the staircase wtf. The pimps and the whores story haha wtf.

- The day passed on by without you as usual. Had I ever crossed your mind today? It's the 11th after all, do you remember?

If You're Tired, Just Turn Back And I'll Be There.

February 11th.

Time flies by again this time. In a blink of an eye, it has been another month. And our memories now seem distant than ever.

It could have been fabulous.


I miss you. I really really do.

I've never posted a pic with our faces clearly before.

Today, I shall do it, one of my very favourite pic :)

- Till you finally decide to stop and start searching, I'll always be here waiting for you to come back. ただ君があいたい。

Tuesday, February 10, 2009


Just completed my tremendously long essay on Recklessness, and finally I have the time to blog.

Let's keep it short.

Classes. Discussion. Indomie (wtf). Very raw egg. Chairs.

That was briefly my day :)

Congratulations Shen,
On your 20th birthday.
May you enjoy your birthday with best wishes :)

Psst. Orientation Night tomorow.

- It was such a busy day, yet my mind still never failed to take a runaway to you.

Monday, February 09, 2009

Till It Comes Again.

Very outdated post.

Have been seeing the couz two days in a row recently. Well, I accidentally bumped into her one day. Talk bout relatives -________-

In Pyramid.

Was supposed to watch Pink Panther 2 together. But we walked past the karaoke and had a sudden change of mind. Yea, we're both fickle minded people. It took us long enough to try making up our minds.

Haha she's so cute.

Lunch at Cheras.

We screamed for about 4 hours and left for dinner as it was our grandmother's birthday. Love :D

That was about my day. Blogger is so slow today, it doesn't let me upload more pics. It's just an excuse for being lazy. So this shall be it.

It's the final day of CNY yo! Did you enjoy your CNY holidays? Let's wait one more year till the ang pau comes around again. Oh ya, and the gambling sessions which will most probably only be applicable to ChingMun. Oh I forgot. She gambles anytime. :P

- The feeling's so strange now. We're like complete strangers who never knew each other, we were once so in love.

Sunday, February 08, 2009

ずっとずっと, アンタと一緒に居たい.

That was what you whispered in my ear, boy.

What happened to it? Was waiting for couz to reach today and my itchy fingers started pressing the buttons on my phone. Soon, I was reading back on the texts we had since Day 1. Everything was so fine, how did we end up this way?

When it felt as if the world had brought me down,
Little did I know that;
You were there watching silently.

Then you came along,
Like the summer rain which washed all stains of winter away.
Showing me things I've never seen before.

You have never failed to put a smile on my face,
Just when I needed you most.

You always tried your best to make me smile,
You were always there by my side,
Making your best efforts,
Ensuring that I had a smile the entire day,

I was the luckiest girl.
No one could have been happier than me.

; Till the day you went away, leaving me in misery
still lost in what went wrong.

- How do I get better once I've had the best?

Wishing Over & Over Again, If Only We Could Still Be One

If today never came and we never had to break apart,
Staying blissfully as one,

Could the heart still be ignorant to the pain it had to feel?

I've always wanted to know.

Friday, February 06, 2009

What If You've Missed It All?

I think you've shown it clearly now

我懂我也知道 你沒有捨不得
I understand and I know that it wasn't difficult for you

You said you'd also be sad, but I don't believe in that

Holding your hand and being by my side, these has all became the past.

你要我說多难堪 我根本不想分开
What else do you want me to do? I never wanted to break apart

Why do you still want me to leave with a smile?

你已经远远离开 我也会慢慢走开
You're now faraway and I'll walk away slowly

Why is that I still let it be your way about us ending the relationship?

I really can't do it

我会学着放弃你 是因為我太愛你
I'll learn to let go of you, it's cuz I love you too much.

I'd want to turn back time, trying to keep you in my embrace

想看你看的世界 想在你梦的画面
Looking into the world that you see, Wanting to be what you see in your dreams

I'd want to turn back time, trying to let the story continue

At least I won't let you leave me anymore

分散时间的注意 这次会抱得更紧
Trying to distract time, cuz this time I'll hold on tighter


An Jing & Hui Dao Guo Qu by Jay Chou

Of Cotton Candy and Chocolates.

Had a 3 hour break today and off we went to Mid Valley for Lunch. Yea, that's most probably the nearest place from Uni.

With Qi in the taxi

Benny Lava Dave

Damn, Pink Panther had some last minute cancellations :(

Perhaps I shall go cut my fringe tomorrow instead wtf.

Sometimes, I find myself trying so hard it hurts. It doesn't seem to anyone that I have indeed been trying. I did, I really did - but I just can't. I don't know why. No matter how hard I try to push it away, it just stays, along with the pain adhered to it.

I'm weak, I admit. I'm not strong like most of you out there. Perhaps, it was the love which took my everything, leaving nothing but broken pieces, made me weak inside. A frail heart. Or perhaps, absence really made the heart grow fonder.

It's killing me inside.

- Perhaps you're not here anymore, but I just wanna let you know that some part of me will always be waiting for you.

Thursday, February 05, 2009

She's Broken Inside.

Extra class tomorrow till 5, damnit. Not much updates today, seriously. I feel so dead. I'm so tired but I don't wanna sleep. I don't know why :(

LiHong's leaving for Aussie soon. We're all gonna miss her. Better have a farewell, or we'll crash your house :D

I don't get you. What's wrong?

Oh ya, it's not supposed to be emo. Panda's on the watch.

* It's a state of bliss you think you're dreaming,
* It's the happiness inside that you're feeling,
* It's so beautiful it makes you wanna cry.

How happy is that :)

I like these lyrics. And I don't know why, I've been listening to Avril's Nobody's Home constantly now. Yea, it's pretty old but I'm into that song all over again now /omg.

Pink Panther 2 this Saturday. The first one was so stupid and retarded I laughed like an idiot. Oh well, doesn' matter whether the show is dumb isn't it? As long as we enjoy it and have a good laugh. That's what matters.

...And everything's gonna be fine I guess.

Cheer me up, anybody?

It's sad how vulnerable the heart is, to the pain it had to endure. Susceptible to everything you do, even a single smile would've made it collapse. I can see in people how hearts can be so strong, yet at the same time it can be so fragile and brittle, breaking at any moment.

It makes me realise that humans tend to hide themselves, behind high walls they've slowly established themselves. In the fear of being hurt once again, hoping that no one will cross that boundary. For they will be defenceless as it is crossed, they will then choose to run away.

This moment is perfect, please don't go away. I'll hold on to it, don't you let it pass you by. I wish I could say that, so badly.

Reality and dreams, I can no longer differentiate. I'd choose to lose myself in the thin line.
Past and present, it matters no more. For I've nothing to lose anymore.
Memories and pain, I'm slowly fading into it, reliving the moments with nobody but myself.

- Let's hope you're enjoying life as it is, seizing the moment like how you always wanted to and be happy.. happy without me :)

Sudden Euphoria

It was just 1 minute plus. It doesn't matter.

Even for a short while.

I was happy :)

I was very surprised, to see that familiar name on the screen.
The voice I thought I have forgotten, is clearer than ever again.



- そのまま「友達」の関係を保ったらいい。それはもう十分だ。

Wednesday, February 04, 2009

It's A State Of Bliss You Think You're Dreaming.

Uni went on like how it normally does. Did crazy stuff as usual. This time, we were bored during Contract lecture and somehow, we ended up doing this. Don't ask me why cuz I forgot how it started :O

We completely forgotten to get rid of it. Later in the day, our Consti lecturer saw it and tried getting it. Ahaha, lame things we do during lectures. His face went /omg when he saw the stuff on the paper wtf.

*Sorry to those who don't know what's the /omg face a.k.a solicitor face. Only those who are closely associated to me on my MSN would understand ;)

As for what was written on the paper,

Spicy pussehs wtf hahaha.

Obscenity? Oops. We were bored, you can't blame us when we have a far from attractive lecturer in front there talking shit about Acceptance directly from the textbook.

I like my class :3

P.S. Panda, this is NOT an emo post. :P

- I could still remember your promise that night. また会えると約束してたのに・・・You promised that we could meet again one day, what happened to it?

Tuesday, February 03, 2009

Just Another Angle.

Went off to Mid Valley again with B after class today cuz tutorial class was cancelled. Went to check out the movies and spontaneously, it was Underworld 3: Rise of the Lycans.

It was better than I expected I guess, but man it was gruesome. I freaked out.

And I just found out, they filmed the movie mainly at Auckland, New Zealand. Damnit. Now even the vampires and werewolves wanna make me feel bad by rubbing it in :/

That stupid ass actually let his own daughter get killed wtf.

Had our session outside Starbucks.

Looking from a different angle, things seems different. Perhaps, it's just a shadow that I've been missing. A shadow which has left me once upon a time.

And then went back to Mid Valley again during the night for dinner with Japanese classmates. Another spontaneous thing, cuz Sensei wanted to try the yee sang. He was so amused by the Chinese culture haha.

Sensei kept asking me about how you were doing and all. How it hurt my heart, to be reminded of you, and how we were when we still had classes together. You were fabulous, and it was so beautiful. Every weekend came and passed by so quickly that I could barely catch up.

I could still remember that you tricked me by saying that you're not attending class that day. The next thing I knew, you were lying there reading your manga smiling at me when I walked in. I still remembered what I first said to you that time, cuz I'm sure that you do too. This, I'm very sure.

I'll wear this by my neck now, just like how you're wearing yours :)

Cuz it's nearer to where the heart is. Or at least, where the heart once was.

- もう限界だよ。超アイタイ。ね、教えて・・・どうしよう?ただアンタをアイタイ。一瞬でもいいから。