How Fake Can Some Hearts Be.

This post is gonna be so lengthy and wordy. So skip this people, if you do not wish to be drowned in the sea of words wtf. But I really need to expres myself here. It's my blog. For those who would want to continue, please proceed :)

It's funny how people can change through the years. One who seemed so nice and innocent could change into someone he is now - someone who is so complicated.

Perhaps, you may blame it on me. Or perhaps, not. I know the pain you have been through, it was terrible. I understand cuz I've been through it myself too. But, I just don't get how you can change like this.

Now, I really don't know what is the truth and what is not. You said you care, you said it hurts to see me like this. But in reality, you may be smiling widely deep inside. This is scary. I don't want to believe that you've became someone like this. It really upsets me. You were so different in the past, the smile you had years ago was so sincere.

You tell me you need to see me face to face when I was down. Yet behind me, you tell her that you don't even want to meet me. Ugh. Why must you be so fake? It's not that whether you wanting to see me or not bothered me, I just thought you cared.

You promised me that I was the only one you'd call by that name, I stuck to that promise. I never called another that. It was only meant for you. Yet I found out again that you call her by the same name. How revolting. Not that it matters to me anymore, but boy, once again I find it so fake.

One night, you even came over and cried to me. Crocodile tears I would call them. Cuz you know clearly where you were and what you did before coming over to my place. Yet, you tell me a completely different story, expecting me to believe in you.

You came and asked me, Why is it all about him now? What happened to the importance of you in my heart? Why is everything I had with him taking over things we had together? What are you in my heart now?

Boy, let me tell you. He's everything I ever wanted. Would that answer be satisfying for you? Yes, you may have been the first. But you'e a complete different person now. You're never the same boy I knew back then anymore. That was the boy I first gave my heart to, not you.

You argued that my time with him was too short compared to us. Yes I agree. But you know what?

I'd give anything for that one month I had with him :)

You'd still have a position in my heart, you always do. For I'll never forget that rainy day when we walked together happily. The days when we were both innocent and knew nothing about being heartbroken.

5 years later, everything has changed. It wasn't a long duration, but I wouldn't say it was short either. We've lost the innocence, and now our hearts are both attached to different people. I'd still cherish the innocent face you always had. How I wished, you've never changed this way. At least, I could have believed into everything you tell me.

You said you weren't good enough if he was better. Perhaps, it might have been that way. Cuz he took my heart away, taking my everything - leaving nothing but an empty space where the heart once was.

- Please don't go away, I need you now. It's so beautiful it makes you want to cry.